What if the life you’d choose turned out to be the life you’re already living?
The question may sound strange, but recently it occurred to me that this is true for me. It wasn’t a conclusion I arrived at through effort or determination. It simply became obvious one day, and it brought with it an extraordinary sense of peace.
That doesn’t mean every dream I’ve ever had has come true. It means that my life, exactly as it is—with all its imperfections—is so rich that it no longer occurs to me to wish it were different. It is more than enough.
Looking back, I realize that nearly all of the “what ifs” that once occupied my mind came from what appeared to be a lack of peace and well-being. What I eventually discovered was that the lack wasn’t real. It was created by my own resistance to whatever I happened to be doing or thinking in the moment.
It’s really that simple.
When Life Becomes Enough
Resistance to the task at hand instantly obscures our sense of peace and well-being. Whether it’s finishing a project, beginning one, calling a friend, exercising, or doing the dishes makes very little difference. The nature of the task isn’t what matters. What matters is whether we’re resisting it.
When there’s no resistance, almost everything becomes surprisingly easy.
My favorite metaphor is swimming in cold water. There are essentially two ways to get in.
One is to stand at the edge trying to talk yourself into it. If you don’t get right in, resistance has probably taken over. The mind quickly produces an endless stream of reasons to wait: the water’s too cold, I’m too cold, maybe the sun will come out, perhaps tomorrow would be better. Every one of those thoughts is simply resistance taking the microphone.
Letting Life Lead
The other option is to dive straight in. The shock lasts only a few seconds, and then it’s over.
Life works much the same way. When we’re no longer unconsciously getting in our own way—when we stop creating mental obstacles for ourselves—most of what once felt difficult turns out to be remarkably manageable.
If you enjoyed this article, you may also enjoy Why We Struggle With Change. It explores why uncertainty feels so uncomfortable and how recognizing our own resilience can change the way we experience life’s inevitable changes.
