I Know Myself Really Well
“I know myself really well” is a statement I often hear from clients. It’s also something I told myself for most of my life. But exactly what are we saying when we make that statement?
More often than not, what we really mean is, “I know what I’m comfortable with. I know what I like and don’t like.” Knowing what you like is great, but whatever is on that list; preferences, tastes, accomplishments, experiences, whatever is on that list doesn’t even remotely describe or capture who you are.
I’d come to see that when I or anyone else makes that statement, we’re essentially saying, “I know what to expect from myself, and for myself. My future will in some way be a repetition of my past.”
What gets left out?
What gets left out? Anything unexpected, anything fresh or new. Any stretching yourself, any growth or development, any wonderful new perspectives. The most accurate way to describe what gets left out is this: what gets left out is life. We drain our sense of possibility, without meaning to do it, or knowing we’ve done it.
What has been does not equal what will be. But by setting up that expectation, can you see how we blind ourselves to the wonderful surprises our lives might offer? If we’re not able to see opportunities for growth, our chances of growing are minimized. The result? We never surprise ourselves. That alone is enough to make anyone’s world feel smaller.
The only thing “I know myself really well” really says is, “I have lots of thinking about who I am, what I can do, and what’s possible in my life.” It’s also saying, what I’ve seen in myself and from myself is all I can expect moving forward.
This is how our lives start to feel smaller than they really are. I turned seventy-one a few weeks ago, and I feel like I have a great deal more life in me than I did at 40, or 50, 0r 60. In other words, my world seems to get bigger and bigger.
If I could give you a single reason why my world seems to be getting bigger and bigger, I wouldn’t hesitate to say it as clearly as can: I saw for myself what I was really made of, and it’s the same thing you, everyone, and everything is made of.
We’re made of conscious awareness.
We’re made of conscious awareness. The nature of consciousness is love, so when I say, “we’re made of conscious awareness,” what I’m really saying is, “We’re made of love.”
Understanding the words, “we’re made of love” on an intellectual can happen almost instantly. It made sense to me immediately. What took a little longer to unfold, and continues to unfold, is carrying the knowledge I’m made of love, not as a thought, or something I’d like to be true, but as a felt experience, one that I’ve become comfortable with enjoying a good deal of the time.
That. Changed. Everything! It turns out those things we think we know about ourselves, even the things we’re sure of? Most of them simply aren’t true, regardless of how true they might feel.
What if simply being willing to question “what I know about myself” could lead to experiences and discoveries you wouldn’t otherwise have? That’s exactly what’s happened to me, and I’ve seen it happen to any number of clients.
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Don’t be so sure you really know yourself. Your willingness to be surprised could lead you to a completely different experience in your own life.
